Sound Off: Is there really love in the club?

Morning!!!!

Pretty interesting question, read on...

Dear LMC,

Have you ever been to one of those big girl parties? I went for the 1st time not too long ago and I had no idea what to make of it. There were girls of all sizes, the music was good but the things that stood out to me were this:

1. Why can't I feel this wanted in a regular club?
2. Is this feeling of me being desired real, as in do most of these guys have a fetish and that's why they are at the club?
3. I had the feeling that alot of the ladies were regulars, and most of the guys were preying on the ones with less esteem.

It felt great to walk into a club and not only be given attention when "that song" comes on - it felt nice that I didn't dress up only to stand on the wall, there were guys who wanted to dance with me and even some who wanted to exchange numbers. I should have gone to these parties before but I don't think I was confident enough to go, plus I heard that the guys were only trying to take advantage. I wonder if it's even worth going to meet a decent guy.

I know this email is all over the place, but do you really think there is love in the big girl club? Have you ever been?

~T



Hey T!

Some of us, myself included have ventured into the "big girl club" scene. The impression that some of us walk away with varies, depending on what the "goal" is. Awhile back I had a pretty lengthy discussion with some of my fellow plus-size beauties. As we talked about clothes, work, men and nonsense, someone brought up "the club", and not just any club but "the big girl club".


For some this is a touchy subject.. depending on where you live the "big girl" scene is different. And until some time ago I was oblivious about the "big girl club" scene out here, I knew they existed but never experienced it. So one day I finally decided to venture out with a group of my friends, I had a great time and like you it was nice to be asked to dance in a club setting. ( I refuse to stand on the wall, but I usually end up dancing alone).

However, I didn't come to the club to look for love.. I went to party. I went to check out the scene I had heard so much about .. and yes.. while I saw some things that were side-eye worthy, I tried my best to remain fair in that I saw side-eye worthy things in "regular" clubs as well. Since then, I've gone to a couple of other parties and every time I must admit I enjoyed being a part of the majority, it's a small rush that I get as I walk in. However, I go to have fun, nothing more.

To answer your questions, I don't think there is love in ANY club, not just one kind of club in particular. Sure you can meet someone at the club, but in the same vein you can meet anyone anywhere. Don't think that you have to go to a specific kind of party in order to meet a guy who likes you. Are you alone in feeling that when you go to a "regular" club that you may not feel as wanted as when you go to a "big girl" club? No, many people might feel the same way you do, the chances are just higher that a guy who is attracted to a plus size woman may go where he knows those women will be. The most important thing is that you feel confident wherever you go, not just a specific type of party. I hope this helps a bit - your confidence and what you think of yourself is what's going to find you love, not the location... you may even find "him" in the least expected place. :)

Have you ever to been to one of the parties we're talking about here? What's the "scene" like in your town? Do you like them or prefer them to other parties? Do you identify with T or have any words of advice for her? What do you think of T's observations?

Sound off, I'd love to hear your thoughts...

~Luvin' My Curves

Reflections on 90 Days of No Shopping…

Good Morning!

So I made it 90 days without shopping for a darn thing. I'm proud of myself; because there were times when I really felt like I needed to shop. Last week on Day 90 I rejoiced a bit on Twitter and the main question I got back was "So when's the shopping spree?" - and to be honest I have no clue. I learned some things along the way and I'd like to share them with you:

1. I need a new hobby.
With no shopping,I found myself incredibly bored. Is this all I do? I questioned myself plenty of times as to how I exactly spent my time.

2. I saved money. The money I saved I applied to credit cards and student loans - it felt nice... sometimes. I also started to put some money away for a small vacation this summer :)

3. I wasted money.
I spoke on this when I reached the halfway mark. (read here)- but I can't stop thinking of how much money I've really spent on clothes.

4. I need to clean out my closets.
No seriously!

5. I AM able to pack for a 2 week trip overseas without shopping.
I've NEVER been able to do this before - I would go on a shopping frenzy before I left because I thought that I didn't have enough. By restricting myself this time around, I saw that I had more than enough to get through the trip.

6. I got creative.
By not being able to just go and get what I just knew I needed at the moment, I was forced to look through my closet to complete my outfits. I found things - as in I didn't know I had them, and I started putting pieces together that I hadn't thought of. I got so into making new outfits that I started taking pictures so that I wouldn't forget. Now that the 90 days are over, I will be extra vigilant in making sure I stay creative with my clothes - why keep buying if I know there's a gem in my closet waiting to be worn and used creatively, it's fun!

7. I appreciate all that I have.
And going back to South Africa definitely drove the point home even further. "Nothing is by chance"... I stop shopping, I go to South Africa and once again see the disparity between the have's and the have nots- I come back stateside and go into a state of deep reflection as to just HOW MUCH I have in all aspects of my life.

I'm shocked that I am not itching to shop now that I can - I have a better assessment of what's really in my closet so when I think of purchasing an item I think of what I already have. Besides for certain events on the horizon, anything I buy at this point will strictly be a desire. I'm hesitant to impulsively jump back into my old habits; as this challenge has made me realize so much more than I thought it would. Thanks for going along for the ride, I appreciated your encouragement!

Fulani Earrings, $17, Gold Coast Africa

How about these for my 1st post-90 days purchase?

What did you all think of my challenge? Did you think I went nuts? Do you think it's something you could do?

Jet lag is no joke! 1 More day of No shopping to go..

If I could spend all my time in Cape Town I would... BUT bills are due, and work calls.. fantasy done!

I'm having a serious case of jetlag (21 hours will do it to you!), and a love hangover from Cape Town- it was a wonderful trip; we did alot of service-learning, a good amount of tourism and the students I took with me had the experience of a lifetime.

As promised, here are some pics for your viewing pleasure:

I know some of you would like to know if I shopped... well I'm proud to say that today is 89 Days of No Shopping. Some of you suggested that I take a break from the challenge because going overseas is an exception but I really wanted to see if I could stick to my challenge. (stay tuned for my post 90 day recap)

With that said... it was hard... so very, very hard! I'm at the Artisans Market purchasing beautiful jewelry, paintings and such for family and colleagues who made the trip possible for my students and I didn't buy a thing for myself. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCRUCIATING THAT IS? It's always great to give to others, but when you're surrounded by beautiful items it's tough to not pick up a trinket or two for yourself.


I hope you all are well, enjoy the pics!

Showin' Love: I Love Me!

Good Morning!

With the S.A.D (Single Awareness Day) holiday approaching - many people will tend to dwell on the lack of love in their lives , all without realizing just how much love they really have in their lives. This year, I'm showing love to myself, because loving myself is where it all starts. The confidence, the clothes, everything starts with the reflection in the mirror. It can't be expressed enough that love starts within, so here's to a Happy Valentine's Day to my Body... Love you!!

Dear My Beautiful Size 18 Body,

I am absolutely in love with you.

I know there have been times when I haven't treated you with the respect that you deserve, I didn't understand why you would refuse to look like my friends, I didn't see the joy in being unique, in being me. I got upset with you when guys didn't like me, when they didn't want to dance with me - instead of realizing that it was their ignorance and not you - my lovely, beautiful curves. I know my body may be the basis for ridicule in other eyes but my body is the one that carries me, nurtures me and gives me the power to get through each and every day.

To my belly, thanks for making me soft, for giving my hands something to rest on as I watch TV. I may not be able to wear a belly shirt or bikini without sideeye glances but I love you regardless.

I love you breasts, thank you for NEVER having to make me stuff my bra. You came early and became the object of many a junior high schooler's affection, you crack me up at the fact that you have the ability to have a conversation with folks without them even saying hello to me! (the awkward moments crack me up!) We had some issues because my bras cost an arm and a leg, but I love you still, thanks for the free drinks!

My derriere... oh how I adore you. I am just realizing that you are full and round when I could have sworn you were flat, and now we have a whole new relationship. You BRING IT when I wear jeans, so it's only right that I wear clothes to complement you instead of act like you don't exist. Thighs, thank you holding me up- keeping me strong and for making me look good in everything!

love what's staring back at you, you're all you've got!

Muffin Top, we're in a constant fight because you make my t-shirts ride up and sometimes you just don't work! However, you are where I see the joy in my nephew's eyes when he hugs me because that's all he can reach- his happiness means more to me than any t-shirt.

I apologize for not dressing you in clothes that didn't work with you- because you deserve only the best. I love you MonifC, Hips & Curves, Abby Z,Lane Bryant, Tadashi, B&Lu, Town Shop, Jimmy Choo, Carlos Santana and all my other friends in my closet- because you fit me like a glove and are the armor that adorns this fashion warrior as she faces the world.

I've always liked you, but I had a problem TRULY loving you because I was too caught up in what others thought of you. Ironic how I truly focused on YOU and fell madly in love at a time in my life when I was questioning what love with another truly meant. Regardless of what the mainstream media tries to tell me , I know that there is nothing wrong with you and that my curves are more than just the latest trend - they will always be SEXY, CHIC and IN STYLE.

I promise to always take care of you; giving you all that you need and indulging you in the things you may want. I vow to never disrespect you or put you in a position that comprises all that you mean to me. I can never go back to envying & wishing to be someone I'm not - I love you and wouldn't trade you for anything or anyone.

MUAH, Happy Valentine's Day!!

If you had to write a love letter to yourself, how would it go? Sound off :)

~Luvin' My Curves

Have a Happy New Year!

It's been a crazy year for Luvin' My Curves, crazy but good! I've achieved some great personal goals (passing the Bar, getting a job) and it's been a pleasure to keep blogging about the fit, fashion and style in the plus size community. Admittedly, I havn't been writing as much like I used to- the new job has taken on so much of my time , and with the move it's been hard to really sit down and focus... but adjustment time is over and it's time to bring back LMC harder and better for 2010.

Have a Happy and Safe New Year, see you on the flip side!

What are you thankful for?

Good Morning!!

I am so happy to be back in NYC for the Thanksgiving holiday, it's been awhile since I've seen my family and close friends and to be honest, I miss the New York feeling. This year has been a whirlwind for me and there is so much to be thankful for so today if you don't mind I'd love to share and hope you take the time to let me know what you're giving thanks for this year.:)


1. Readers, Twitter Followers, Facebook Fans. Thank you for your patience, I know I havn't been blogging like I used to but thanks for sticking around nonetheless. I love reading entry comments, and emails from you it's exciting!

2. A job!!! Times are hard and I was fortunate enough to land one just as I felt like giving up looking for one. I love what I do, and I'm so excited for the potential to grow. I'm truly blessed to be in a good situation. I have a great group of students who make even the tough days worth it.

3. Passing the Bar!! OMG, I am soooo thankful that this chapter is over- the only thing that's left of this process is getting sworn in. But no more books- no more studying, no more worrying.

4. Friends and Family. As always my biggest support, regardless of the paths I choose. So much has happened in a year, so much has changed - those that are still around, thank you. Everything happens for a reason, even if the reason is unknown right now. I've learned alot of lessons and I'm a better person for it.

What are you thankful for this Thanksgiving?

Have a wonderful & love-filled Thanksgiving. If you're venturing out for Black Friday, be safe and I wish you many steals & deals!

~Luvin' My Curves

Every Girl needs some Pearls....

Good Morning!!!

Double Strand Pearl Necklace, $85 Toccata, Etsy (this designer also has single & triple strand necklaces)

So... pearls...every girls needs some!! They are one of the ULTIMATE accessories; can you imagine the one piece of jewelry that can instantly glam up anything- think of pearls are the LBD of the accessory world.

Single or double stand, choker or loose - pearls through uniform in appearance allow for you to tap into your own creativity in how to wear them. Mix lengths (a la Rihanna, below) , go "dramatic" with an all black suit, or go "demure" with a single strand, a-line skirt, simple cardigan and flats or funk them up like I do - mixing them with chunky multicolor chains, scoop neck t's jeans and platforms. The choice is yours...

Glory Pearl Necklace, $6.80, Forever 21 ; Rihanna mixes lengths- taking the classic to a new level

Don't worry about the cost- pearls are a piece of jewelry that you should feel comfortable with buying a good imitation... (Jackie O' wore a fake strand that years after her death were sold for thousands!)

Keyrose's Faux Pearl Layered Necklace & Earrings Set $34.95 ; Reign's Graduated Faux Black Pearl Jewelry Set $34.99 ;
Judy's 24 Inch Imitation Pearl/Necklace Earring Set $24.99, all from Emitations

If you're not sold on the necklace, start slow... pearl studs add instant class to any outfit.

Set of 24 Pearl Studs, assorted colors $1.99 Fabuless.com

I know many of you think that pearls are snobby or only for older women, but I'm telling you pearls are timeless and work for any woman rich or broke, young and old. What was once seen as a sign of privilege and elitism is now for everyone!

Want some more? Check out :

All Girls Love Pearls

Emitations

Girl Props

What do you think of pearls? How do you wear them?

~Luvin' My Curves

Things that make me smile... Glamour & Fat Love

Good Morning!

I love being happy, I love to smile and I especially love when there are things out there that celebrate instead of tear down the fact I love me, extra curves, and all.


I love that Glamour celebrates "normal" women with this beautiful photo shoot...

There's also a really interesting article about this over on Glamour. (I peeped the "hint" of diversity in this spread, could have done better on this part but I still applaud the main point of the shoot.)

The Museum of Fat Love started by Fatshionista triggers the hopeless romantic in me (especially after the More to Love "I won't love ME until someone else does" debacle). Yes, we love too and this is a developing collection that there are people who love curves in happy relationships, they are also accepting pictures from individuals, so if you've made that journey from self-loathing to self-love then this would be a really cool project to participate in, your words just might be the thing that someone else needs to see.

(courtesy of Museum of Fat Love)

What are your thoughts on this?

~Luvin' My Curves...smiling!

Blowin' Out Candles

Today is the big 2-7... no clever "sweet sixteen + 10" just 27... I'm feeling old.. but feeling great. Thinking about the past year,it's been a crazy, crazy mix of highs & lows, both personal & professional. I want to say thank you all for coming along for the ride, it's been fun!I want to apologize for not posting as often lately, a new job, relocation, adjustment and a huge loss in my family it's been hard to sit down and blog- life happens and I just ask that you bear with me in the process.

What I want for my birthday....well I want to keep giving you all the best in plus size fashion, I want to keep giving you my insight to issues that affect us curvaceous women, and I want my words to hopefully keep motivating others to feel more confident in their own skin.

And of course a little last minute birthday "shopping" never hurt anyone....

Tangiers Printed Dress $52.90, Avenue

Pebble Tina Slouch Boot, $62, Torrid (wide width & wide calf, my dream!)

cashmere stripe cardigan, 179 GB, Anna Scholz

~Luvin' My Curves...making a birthday wish!!

If you're going to be a fat fashion blogger then you actually need to be fashionable.....

I've gotten a couple of emails like this before but I think this one just did it for me - it could have offended me, but instead just challenged me, read on:

LMC, I love your blog but I want to know why you don't show edgier pieces- your style is like the typical fat girl, it's not haute couture, it's not edgy or high end. I see others trying lines that don't traditionally carry plus sizes and they make it work for them so I look to you and see you don't do the same thing- why is that? You're plain compared to others, and I struggle with reading your blog and still liking you when I see others do it so much better. If you're going to be a fat fashion blogger then you actually need to be fashionable.

-Questioning

Dear Questioning,

I respect your opinion and I appreciate you letting me know your concerns. What I love about being a blogger is that there are so many opinions- and as a reader you have a plethora of options when reading. Luvin' My Curves is meant to be informative, fashionable, yet realistic to me and loads of others that I know. I never know what article will help, motivate or inspire a reader and that's the joy of doing this.

I dress for me, I don't follow trends to the "T", never did- it's not my style. While I applaud those who are edgier with their looks, it's not me and I don't try to be something or someone I'm not.I venture into new styles and looks but remain mindful of what looks good on my body. I'm 5'3", pretty endowed in the chest, I have a tummy that is stubborn and won't leave , about to be 27 years old and in the legal field- the others you speak of are taller,younger and may be in a work field that allows them to be more expressive with their clothes and yes they are definitely edgier than I am- which is why I love them too!

I'm a grown woman, in a career that doesn't allow much expression with clothes- I do what I can but I also respect my craft. I know my body and though I would love to wear a bodycon skirt I know that it wont look the best on me- I'll talk about it on this blog but you wont see it on my frame until it looks good on me - I owe that much to my readers and myself that if I'm going to wear certain things that it look good on me.

By nature, I'm not an edgy chick... that's not me -and if you've read Luvin' My Curves I've stated many times that it's been a continual yet fun process for me to step into pieces that I wouldn't normally wear.
I've never claimed to be super-fearless, but I've always been willing to step out my comfort zone and try.

Though I love clothes, love style and love fashion I have to be smart about my purchases (at times) I can't splurge on pieces that I know won't fit and won't translate to the court room or the board room. In addition, a size 18 on a woman who is 5'7 looks completely different on a size 18 who is 5'3"- so what may work for one may not work for me. An XL in one line may fit a taller lady, but may look tight and not cute on my 46G's. Hence, why you haven't seen a piece of Forever 21 on me - I've tried it before, it didn't work on my frame and I won't spend money of something that hugs in all the wrong places just to prove a point.

Another thing you are 20.. and through not that much younger than me, young enough that you didn't really feel the brunt of lack of clothing options when coming through high school - you at 20 have OPTIONS galore to choose from. When I was going through high school both Ashley Stewart and Lane Bryant did not have the color, cut and fit that they do now... Torrid was not in existence just as the majority of other sites and clothing lines you shop from now. You're lucky.... it was hard to find clothes that were affordable, fashionable and fit me well.

I'm not trying to be mean, but I hope you respect my stance- I can only be me and will continue to do so. I didn't grow up being completely comfortable in my own skin, I battled just like many of my readers did - which I why I understand the apprehension that shopping and clothes cause, which is why I speak on gaining confidence because I appreciate what a heightened confidence has done for me. Not every curvy girl will jump for Beth Ditto's line- it might be too much for them- while others have dived head first.

Plus size women come in all shapes, sizes, and attitudes. There are those who will walk down the runway like it was made with their walk in mind- others will walk confidently while being scared s&#$!!, others will walk sheepishly with their head down wishing they could run backstage and there are those who will never even hit the stage, too scared and too concerned about others opinions. Same goes for fashion and style- I think we all need to respect it, appreciate it and relish in the diversity in our community.

I want to thank you though... your words indirectly challenged me-you put me on notice and I appreciate it. Your email sparked something in me , and I'm excited for what's about to come- stay tuned :)

~Luvin' My Curves

WUK UP for Caribana 2009 with The Fuller Woman Network!

Good Morning!!

I'm tempted to write this post in Jamaican patois but I wont' do that to you all. :)
Every year folks converge on T-town to get their wine on and celebrate what we call Caribana!!! Read on and find out why YOU need to be there this August 1st!

courtesy of Torontoist.com

This year, The Fuller Woman Network will make history as the first ever group of Plus size women to have a section in the Caribana parade dedicated to them.

Caribana 2009 celebrates its 42nd anniversary, it is the largest Caribbean festival in North America. Presented by the Festival Management Committee, the three-week Festival attracts over a million participants annually, including hundreds of thousands of American tourists.

This jubilant extravaganza where people from around the world will take to the streets of Toronto in an outpouring of enthusiasm for the culture and pleasures of the Caribbean will feature The Gem Stones. Presented by The Fuller Woman Network, The Gem Stones float will feature confident, sexy & outgoing women in custom made costume and head dress.

With over 60% of the women in North America being considered plus size, this is the perfect opportunity for women to celebrate their curves during this event that kicks off in Toronto, Canada on Monday July 14^th. Those attending are in for a treat as the celebration continues through Sunday August 2^nd.

Complete with live music performances, the parade will take start at Exhibition Place and proceed west along Lake Shore Boulevard. Admission to the event which takes place on August 1^st from 10am-6pm is $20-$25 to enter Exhibition Place. Spectators can witness this celebration for free on Lake shore Boulevard.

The Fuller Woman Network was established in 2004 as an image consulting firm catering exclusively to plus size women with the motto, “Image for both Body & Mind” as our guide, The Fuller Woman Inc. has evolved into a facet of subsidiary companies ranging from clothing designs, girls camps to our newly created project The Fuller Woman Expo. Their goal; the advancement, acceptance and celebration of the plus size woman. On a mission to empower women to recognize their internal and external beauty through educational workshops and seminars where she will begin to accept, love, respect, treasure and celebrate her unique beauty and join the CURVY REVOLUTION, The Fuller Woman Network is a definite thumbs up!

If you're interested in playing mas with The Fuller Woman Network contact playmaswithtfwexpo@gmail.com or call 416-208-3923 for more information.

Here are some videos to give you a taste of Caribana:

Will I be there? Definitely trying to make it!!! Who's coming with me?!

What are your thoughts on Caribana?

~Luvin' My Curves.... mi gwaan!

It's my "Boob"aversary!!

Good Morning!!

I know some you are looking at the title of this post like "huh" but yes, today is my "boob"aversary! (actually it was yesterday) We've talked about "Boob Issues" here before but I'd be remiss to ignore the issues that many women (regardless of size) face and it happens to be a subject that I've gone through myself.

On June 7th, 2004, a week after my college graduation, I had a breast reduction.

Spring 2003... Capetown South Africa, right before a back spasm that took me out of enjoying my trip for 2 days.

I've always been well-endowed - there were alot of junior high school boys who got their kicks by talking and staring at the "girls" instead of me (I really believe that some of them did it without, even thinking, I forgive you, lol) - they would never tell me when my button down shirt would decided unbutton because it gave them a mini peep show of my bra. I was overly self-conscious about my chest


My breaking point was my Uncle's 50th Birthday, I had come home from college for the weekend and I couldn't fit into any of my dresses because my breasts kept growing to the point where being a size 18 didn't matter and I was forced to put on a size 28 dress. This decision wasn't just cosmetic- being 5'3" with 46JJ's in the way was at times just plain painful. At the most random time a pain would shoot through my back that was so severe all I could do was lay down and wait for the pain to pass.

Something had to give and it was going to have to be the "girls".

2 days before the surgery...46JJ's gotta go!

I spent the spring of my college senior year imagining the major change that was about to happen, but nothing can prepare you until it happens. The day of the surgery I was in a fog- I didn't want to talk to anyone... what was I about to do????

The surgery came & went... from the moment I looked down at my bandaged self I started to panic! WHERE WERE MY BOOBS??? I had an anesthesia induced meltdown and if I wasn't the one having the tantrum I would have laughed... I was told that when the nurse came to check on me I looked at her chest and said "You big breasted b&^%!@ have all the fun! I want mine back!"

My recovery went well, but I dealt with alot of stares from people who weren't used to seeing a smaller me. In essence, I was dealing with the same thing - people were still focusing on the girls. I dealt with guys telling me that what I did was wrong, but of course it was for selfish reasons.I started to realize that for years, I looked to my breasts for my (at the time) still growing sense of sexuality and now they were gone. (Let me clarify, I am still very well endowed BUT nothing like before)

I made the decision because it was just painful, simple things were becoming difficult. My heavy breasts caused deep grooves in my shoulder that became sore to the touch from carrying the load and they were scarred. My back and neck were strained, which made carrying my books to class excruciating, not only was I carrying books but I was carrying my weight as well.

My conclusion was that this surgery had nothing to do with anyone else but ME. I was happier, a load had been lifted off of me and I wasn't as self-conscious as I was before. My shirts fit so much better, and even though I'm still pretty well-endowed I'm not in pain anymore. Everyone had an opinion but at the end of the day, I did what was best for me and have no regrets.

Some may think that this post is TMI, but I write this post knowing that alot of ladies, both small and curvy have breast issues and are apprehensive about making the decision to get a reduction. In the media we see many stories about people wanting breast implants, but what about those who are in pain because they have too much?

I am by no means a doctor, all I can do is share my experiences so I suggest that if you're thinking about getting a reduction seek out a professional for an evaluation and discuss the benefits and the risks with this kind of procedure.

2 weeks before the surgery.

So the girls are 5... I won't go to the extreme and have a party of anything but maybe I'll treat myself to a pretty new bra. Happy Boobaversay Girls, thanks for making room and making the load of carrying books and huge purses so much easier!

So, let's talk! Have any of you had a reduction, have you considered it? What are your apprehensions? For the guys, do you have an issue if a woman had a reduction?

~Luvin' My Curves...

High Heel Confidential

Good Morning!!

Today I want to talk about something that we all either love or hate.... walking in high heels!

I don't know what it is; the sex appeal factor, vanity, or our closets -but we often find ourselves putting on heels even when we know it will mean pain later. For me it's equal parts fashion as sometimes I think my outfit will be carried out better by a heel and another part sex appeal because I know heels give me that extra oomph!!

There's a part of me that thinks I can be like Carrie Bradshaw and walk (sometimes run) in high heels so easily but it just doesn't happen and I break out the ballet flat that I made sure to stash in my bag.

When I say I've tried everything to alleviate the pain/anxiety of walking in high heels, I mean it. I've tried everything.Awhile ago, an article in Vibe Vixen suggested trying trying the Yamuna Hand & Foot Wakers which "reeducate" feet by improving muscle tone & strengthening arches. Me being the product junkie I am bought them immediately! I followed the booklet while I watched TV and in a couple of weeks, I wasn't cured but I also wasn't throwing my shoes to the side when a soca tune came on, definite improvement.

However, I still dreaded the thought of walking in heels all day- somehow the thought of me walking into court in flats didn't have the same intimidation factor as the loud *smack* of a high heel. Determined to at least be able to go for a couple of hours in heels I searched and found a LegWork class in NYC. (This class is definitely the truth!)

Why do I torture myself so? You want to talk about a workout?? And I didn't even take one step in my heels yet! Our instructor had us do a grueling leg/thigh workout followed by a continual catwalking so that she could individually assess what we needed to work on. My issue was that I wasn't moving my hips enough as I walked, I chalk it up to being to concerned with falling but she worked with me until I could strut down the length of the classroom with my head high, hips rolling and silently hoping that I wouldn't at least break a tooth when I fell.

The one thing I realized, is that walking in high heels without wanting throw your shoe at someone is more about developing strength. If my legs are conditioned to walk as opposed to putting all the weight on the balls of my feet then I'm good to go! So I'll keep practicing

Here are some tips if you're still struggling:

1. Practice, Practice, Practice!! Walk around your house in your heels- look at yourself in the mirror just to check out how you look in heels, do your normal routine in heels just to get used to walking around in them. Then, when walking in the house starts to feel better try to wear them while doing something like going out to dinner with the girls.

2. Smart small, don't start in 3-4 inch heels and expect to be able to glide easily. Smart with a 2 inch heel or a platform and work your way up.

3. Heel, Toe. Always make sure that your heel strikes the ground before your toe does.

4. Chunky heels are a beginner's best friend- stiletto's can be intimidating when 1st starting to walk so start chunky and then trim your way down if you like.

5. Platforms are great too- they give you the added height but a flat base which makes it easier to walk in.

6. Posture!! Try this trick that I got from stylist B.Coates : stand in your heels then drop your head & arms down to your toes , slowly roll back up vertebrae by vertebrae until you are standing up straight. Your head is high, your shoulders are back- this is how your posture should be when walking.


Need a visual? This video is nice and basic.

and if you want to really work it out, here's a Stiletto Workout with June Ambrose!!




So let's talk, do you love or hate high heels? If you hate them, tell me why and if you love them share the love and any tips!

**GIVEAWAY:** If you're struggling in your heels, and need help email me for your chance to win a free LegWork DVD! Email me at luvinmycurves@gmail.com and tell me why you and high heels don't get along!

~Luvin' My Curves.... struttin' in my heels!

What J is Jonesin' For..... SPECIAL REPORT

Good Morning!

I had a post all planned out but there was NO WAY I could ignore something this major... if you havn't seen my messages on Twitter , then you might not know...

I PASSED THE NY BAR EXAM!!!!!

I had to let you all know because you've seen the struggle right here from the start, the dread of studying, the disappointment of failing, realizing that Law isn't everything and going through it all again.


So what does this mean?

Well for starters it means I can finally change the "About Me" blurb that say I'm waiting for results and change it something clever like "waiting for it be official" or something like that. I'm relived that after 4 years of law school and 2 Bar Exams later I can close that chapter. A HUGE emotional weight has been lifted off my shoulder and it's feel so good!

No more planning for events in the coming months while in the back of my head thinking " if I pass", which means this summer is about to be GREAT!!!

My study buddies I am so proud of all of us, pass or not we all put in the hours and dealt with the frustration.For those that were not successful this time "God's delay is not a denial" and I'm in support of whatever you choose to do.

Thanks to all of you who sent me words of encouragement, kept me in your thoughts and threatened to get crazy with the Bar Examiners if they acted up. Thank you to my guest bloggers who helped me out when I just couldn't do it all.


And to think, just yesterday I was jonesin' for this.....


~Luvin' My Curves, Esq!

*Let the celebration begin....

LMC does "More to Love" in Brooklyn

Hey Everyone!!

How was your weekend?!

Mine was great!!! I went to the Curvy All Star Weekend Party at Stitch on Friday, took over Brooklyn with my folks visiting from Detroit (More to Love Casting call, Fulton St. & Re/Dress) on Saturday, and then on Sunday tried to explain to my grandpa what a blog was..... it didn't work.

Me & Chenese Lewis at Curvy All Star Weekend Party

I wanted to give you all a glimpse of the curvy hopefuls that came out for the "More to Love" casting call in Brooklyn this past Saturday. I know I spoke about my skepticism of the show in a previous post, but my curiosity led me to check the casting call out for myself. Though I was late, there was a pretty decent turnout... and I couldn't help but to ask "What brought you to "More to Love?"

another perspective...

I was trying to film and rock at the same time... even people passing by had to stop to hear this lady flow!

...and no I didn't try out after all :/ ( I know I'm a punk!)

~Luvin' My Curves

What J is Jonesin' For.... April Edition

TGIF!!!

Now that I'm officially off of my No-Buy Month, my mind has been going crazy thinking of all the things I could buy , but then I step back into reality and tell myself that I need to keep my "Jonesin'" in check!

This month my Jonesin' has no particular theme- just whatever tickles my fancy. The only "suggestions" via Mom is that I have to show some color and some leg this spring, she also "suggests" that I show some curves - so I'm looking for clothes that outline my curves without telling the full story ;)

Let's get to it....

So though I'm looking for color this spring, I love this dress from Old Navy. And yes, I have a similar dress and it's black but there is something about this fit that I'm feeling.

Sateen Dress $39.50, Old Navy

Qristyl Frazier's spring line dropped last week, so definitely make sure to check out her site. This is my favorite, (I want it in coral) and I've already imagined myself in it.

Twist Tie Knotted Knit Dress $150 Qristyl Frazier Designs.

Because I'm short this might show that much leg, but I still like it. (Nothing that 3" heels can't fix)

Pleated Linen Dress $39, Ashley Stewart

The design of this tunic is simple but I love the print!

Fiona Tank $30, B & Lu

If I'm going to show some leg, then that means I've just GOT TO have some cute shoes!

Beige White Cat Orsen Heel $32, Torrid ; L.A.M.B Tailynn T-Strap Sandal $369.95, Endless

By now you should know that I'm an Accessories Junkie! I WANT THIS RING! I really like opal jewelry and rings that stretch, this has both! The studs are definitely a step away from the normal diamond stud but is still classic, just my style!

Natural Opal Goddess Ring- $12 WorkofHeart from Etsy, Sapphire & Amethyst Double Stud Earrings $26.99, Emitations

Ok I think this is enough... what are you all Jonesin' for?

Oh... 2 more things:

1. I'm Jonesin' for a major clothing score at the Fat Girl Flea Market tomorrow. (I'm also excited to meet some of you tommorrow, make sure to say Hello!)

2. Last but not least, I'm Jonesin' to see my Best Friend who is on her way home from serving a tour in Iraq! I am overwhelmed and just grateful that she's returning safe. I cann't wait to see her!!!


Have a wonderful weekend!
~Luvin' My Curves

It's Springtime

Good Morning!!

Today is the first official day of spring - does it feel like spring in your area?

I'm taking lil' vacay, be back Monday!

Enjoy your weekend!
~Luvin' My Curves

Happy to be back...

Good Morning!!!

So The Bar Exam is over and I will spare you the details and fast-track the conversation...

"How was it? " It was

"How did you do?" My very best

I'm glad to be back to "normal" and so excited because there is just so much going on! To my guest bloggers - THANKS A BUNCH!! I appreciated your help immensely because I just couldn't do it all.


What's in store? LOTS! I'm coming at you with loads of "pocket-protector" money-saving ideas, style challenges, catching up on "Ask LMC" and so much more.


Congratulations to Monif C and Douglas Says for representing lovely for "Size Sexy" at BET's Rip the Runway. (make sure to watch on Monday, March 2nd at 9pm) Ms. Sharon Quinn has the exclusive lowdown here.


Also another event to put on your summer calendar; The First Annual Curvy Girls at Sea, 5 night Bermuda Cruise brought to you by Monif C. I'm doing my best to be there, will I see you?

Have a wonderful weekend!

Glad to be back....
~Luvin' My Curves

Showin' Love: Part I

It's all about love this week.....

and no, not just romantic love , but the love that we have for ourselves as well as the love shown for us.


I get alot of emails from ladies who just feel like the fellas don't show us love; at the club or just in general. At times, I feel the same way too... guys slipping me their number on the low so their friends won't see that they like a big girl,or a guy telling me that he'll make an "exception" because I have a cute face... oh yes! However, what's changed is my attitude- and because of that I only accept and acknowledge those men who approach me with respect and an appreciation of who I am and yes my curves as well. :) It's been a process to luv' me as is, and to deal with anyone who can't be open about luvin' me too(plus size and all) is just unacceptable at this point.

So this week I'm luvin' those who show us luv' in their own way....

For today, one prefers to date only plus size women, while the other admits that some of us "catch his eye"- either way their honesty is refreshing and I couldn't help but to repost.

1. Big Love: On His Mind from Essence Magazine.
2. Naked with Socks on "Ode to the Big Girl" - can't help but to respect his honesty.

I know there are some plus size ladies out there who aren't in love with themselves, which stops them from being the fierce and fabulous chicks they are destined to be.

SO... if you'd help me I'd like all of you to post as to what do you love most about being plus size... hopefully these comments would help somebody start to love their reflection. (Fellas, you can post what you love about us but please keep it respectful ( shouldn't have to tell you that, but still!)

~Luvin' My Curves..."always act like you're wearing an invisible crown"

***Oh yes, CONGRATULATIONS to fellow fabulous full-figured gal Adele for winning the Grammy for Best New Artist, her album "19" has been a favorite of mine for just about a year when my girl across the pond sent it to me with a note that read "she's one of us!"***

Things that make me smile... SecretTrois

.... taking a breather from the books..

just want to say thank you for the e-cards, emails and inspirational words some of you have sent me while I'm studying. I especially enjoy the sarcastic ones like "Are you there LMC? It's me Closet".

I know I havn't been blogging much lately- but I've put my focus into shutting the library down and getting this Esq. attached to my name.

I wanted to share this video that I found during a study break- I couldn't help but to pump my fists in the air and dance in my chair.. I don't care if the people at the other table were staring..

luvin' the tutu!! and LOL @ the monopoly money!

These ladies call themselves "Secrettrois" and they hail from D.C!

Beautifu'll, Toi and Armistice told me that they just like to dance and have fun, so one day they decided to tape it and put it on YouTube to see what kind of feedback they would receive. They just want to show that just because you're a certain size or look a certain way, you can do whatever you want! Their message is quite simple "Love who you are and the skin you're in" .

They do take requests when they are in abundance for a certain song- so I'm putting out a request for a dancehall tune. (Perhaps "Sweep" by Elephant Man or "Good as fi dem" by Tony Matterhorn)

They'll be on the Tyra Show this Friday so when you watch- make sure to tell me about it!!

Want to see them for yourself? SecretTrois on YouTube & Myspace

What do you think of these ladies?

Luvin' My Curves.... back to the books.